Chapter 1 I Will Not Regret It

The heat from the man's body surrounded her slowly from behind as the moisture in his breath came closer to her ear when he whispered, “Is this your first time?” The unfamiliar atmosphere near her ear sent a chill down her spine, yet she dared not make any sound. Lin Xinyan could feel the man paused for a bit, then came the man's voice again, “There is still time to say no.” She nervously clenched her hands, shook her head, and said “I will not regret it.....” She was 18 years old. This was supposed to be the most wonderful years in her youth but yet..... It hurts! The excruciating pain made her trembled in the man's arms. Keeping the only dignity left for herself, Lin Xinyan bit her lips and stayed quiet the whole time. This was her first sexual experience. She was nervous and fearful of the man. At the same time, she could feel his muscular body with unbelievable strength. He didn't seem to tire out and kept conquering her body, fulfilling his lust in this long and miserable night. After he was done, the man got up and entered the bathroom. Lin Xinyan rose from the bed exhausted; she put on her clothes and left the room. In the hotel lobby, stood the middle-aged women who sealed the deal for her. When she saw Lin Xinyan coming out, she passed her a black plastic bag and whispered, “This is your reward.” Lin Xinyan took the bag without hesitation and hurried out of the hotel with the money. She rushed to the hospital in the shortest possible time and paid no attention to the pain in her abdomen. The corridor was quiet before daybreak. Two stretchers laid waiting before the operation theatre. They were blocked for they hadn’t make the payment yet. When Lin Xinyan saw that, she was devastated and started sobbing, “I have money, I have the money! Please save my mother and brother......” While sobbing, she quickly handed the money to the doctor. Then the doctor had the nurse counted the money and ordered the staff to push her mother into the operating to prepare for surgery. Seeing that her brother was not being pushed into the operating theater, Lin Xinyan begged the doctor, “Please save my brother as well.” “I'm sorry. It is too late. There is nothing we can do now.” The doctor answered with a heavy heart. Too late? The truth hit Lin Xinyan like a heavy club shattering all of her hopes brutally. The pain was so unbearable that it felt like she was stabbed on the chest with a knife while the cramps and spasms made her weak and she was unable to stand on her feet. Eight years ago, when she was ten, her father had an affair and left her and her pregnant mother. He had them sent overseas to a place that was completely strange to them. After that, her brother was born. He was diagnosed with autism when he was three years old. This brought more hardships to their already tight financial situation. She and her mother worked many part-time jobs to get by. When the accident struck suddenly, she felt complete hopelessness as she had no relatives, no money nor the support of this cold and ruthless society. As the last resort, she sold herself. Yet, she was not able to bring her brother back to life. She felt miserable but she had not lost herself just yet. Life was very cruel but she had to take it with a smile for she had her mother to take care of. Her mother needed her. After the treatment, her mother was slowly recovering. But, she was completely heartbroken after knowing that her son had passed away. Lin Xinyan cried as she hugged her and said, “Mom, I'm right here. Please be tough and continue to live on.” For one month in the hospital, Zhuang Zijin always sat by the bed and was in a daze all day. Lin Xinyan knew that she was missing her brother. If it was not for her, her mother would have died along with her brother. She was expelled from school as for her long absence as she had to take care of her mother. Luckily, her mother was getting better by the day. The woman brought some food to the hospital. Just when she was about to open the door into the ward, she heard some voice from inside. It sounded familiar to her. Even though it had been eight years, she could still remember the look on his father's face when he forced her mother into a divorce. He never came to see them even once after bringing them here; his sudden appearance today baffled them. “Zijin, you were once very close to the madam from the Zong family and you agreed to an arranged marriage. According to the promise, your daughter should marry a member of the Zong family.” “What do you mean, Lin Guoan?!” Zhuang Zijin wanted to beat him up so badly with her weak body that was yet to fully recover from the injuries. How inhumane he was to do this to her! He never cared about them after moving them to this god forsaken place. And now he was here to take her daughter back to have her marry the Madam's son. “Young Master Zhishen is your best friend's son. He is good-looking and his family is very well off. If she marries into the family, she would surely be having a much easier life there”. He softened his voice as he spoke. Young Master Zhishen was virtuous and good-looking. But one month ago, he was bitten by a poisonous snake when he was on a business trip overseas. That accident paralyzed his nervous system, leaving him disabled and impotent. Once married, she would not be happy there. “I will marry him.” Lin Xinyan opened the door and said, “I will marry him but on one condition.” Lin Guoan was stunned when he saw Lin Xinyan. She was only ten when he last saw her. Now she had grown up with a fair and beautiful skin, yet she looked seriously skinny and physically underdeveloped. He had another adorable daughter in the family. She wasn't beautiful though. With that look, it would still be reasonable for her to marry an impotent person. That made Lin Guoan feel better. He then asked, “What are your terms?” “I want to go home with my mother and you need return everything that is rightfully hers. Only then will I marry him.” Said Lin Xinyan slowly as she calmed down. Although she was not in her home country, she had heard so much about the Zong family's great successes and remarkable wealth when she was little. Lin Xinyan thought that the offer was too good to be true because Young Master Zhisen could be a man who was very ugly with birth defects. Even so, this was a good opportunity for her to go home. With that, she could claim her mother’s dowry she brought with her when she married her father. “Yan Yan...” Zhuang Zijin tried to advise her because a marriage was a serious matter. After all the hardships they went through, she did not want her daughter to risk marrying the wrong person. Worried that Lin Xinyan could be persuaded by Zhuang Zijin to turn down the marriage proposal, Lin Guoan quickly said, “Alright, you can go home as long as you promise to marry him.” “What about my mother's dowry?” Lin Xinyan asked him with an emotionless tone. When Zhuang Zijin married Lin Guoan, she brought with her a considerable amount of dowry. It would be very difficult for him to give it back. “Dad, I suppose my younger sister is very pretty. Therefore, she deserves a better life. She would be doomed if she marries an impotent man. Furthermore, you and my mother are divorced. Which means you should return everything she brought into the family.” Lin Guoan looked away from her diffidently. How did she know that Young Master Zhishen was impotent when she had been living overseas all these years? Lin Guoan did not know that Lin Xinyan was just assuming. The man then reluctantly said, “I'll give it back to you once you marry him.” With her pretty look, why would his younger daughter marry an impotent man? Being impotent was no different from being useless regardless how distinguished the man was. Thinking about that gave Lin Guoan a sense of relief. But now he hated Lin Xinyan even more for ripping him off. Lin Guoan smirked at the young woman and barked, “How rude of you! I see your mother has not been educating you properly!” Lin Xinyan thought that it should have been his responsibility also. He left her here and had not cared about her since. However she knew she mustn't say that because she had no bargaining chip over him. Annoying Lin Guoan would not be a wise move. “Get ready, we are leaving tomorrow.” Lin Guoan then threw his arms out of his vest and walked out of the ward.